Gin Advent Calendar Days 16 & 17: In Which I Introduce My New Assistant, Glenda

MrsVark is recuperating (I think the cherry gin may have pushed her over the edge). Glenn the mannequin is apparently too busy writing Christmas cards. So for Days 16 and 17 of the Gin Advent Calendar, I'm joined by another member of our household: Glenda. Glenda is a professional. She's also a former colleague at the retail firm I work for, who we took in when her store closed. To make herself presentable for tonight’s recording, she borrowed what she tells me are MrsVark's nipple tassels. I haven't actually asked MrsVark if they're hers, and frankly, I'm not sure I want to know the answer. The important thing is that Glenda brings a certain je ne sais quoi to the proceedings. Mainly because she doesn't interrupt, doesn't disagree with my tasting notes, and has magnificent posture.

Day 16: That Boutique-y Gin Company's Spit-Roasted Pineapple Gin

I'll be honest, when I saw "Spit-Roasted Pineapple Gin" on the label, I had concerns. It sounds like something you'd witness at a very specific type of establishment. But credit where it's due: this gin actually tastes like burnt pineapple. Not in a "we've cocked this up" way, but in a "we've deliberately caramelised this tropical fruit" way. It's sweet, it's got that charred edge, and it's surprisingly drinkable. Would I drink it neat? Probably not. But then, I’m not sure I’d drink any of these gins neat if I hadn’t made it part of the schtick as the start of this marathon gin tasting. Would I use it in a cocktail? Absolutely. Would I serve it at a party where Glenda was also in attendance? Well, that depends on the party, doesn't it?

The Verdict: 7/10. A solid effort that does exactly what it says on the tin. Or bottle. You know what I mean.

Day 17: Roku Gin

After the pineapple adventure, we moved on to Roku Gin, which is a Japanese gin that's been knocking about for a while. It's made with six Japanese botanicals, which sounds impressive until you realise that most gins have about a dozen botanicals anyway. It's a perfectly decent gin. Nothing wrong with it. Nothing particularly exciting about it either. It's the sort of gin you'd serve that’s just diferent enough from London Dry Gin to be noticeable and make you look cultrued, but not so different your guests won’t like it. Glenda seemed to approve, though to be fair, she approves of everything. That's what I like about her.

The Verdict: 6/10. Competent, professional, gets the job done. A bit like Glenda, really.

A Brief Interlude About Days 14 & 15

While we're here, I should mention that only eight people have watched the Days 14 & 15 video so far. Eight. That's fewer people than we have mannequins... well, actually, it's not fewer than two, is it? But Glenda assures me the maths works out, and I'm not about to argue with someone wearing nipple tassels; they’re too distracting.

If you haven't caught up yet, Days 14 & 15 featured Jaffa Cake Gin and That Boutique-y Gin Company Cherry Gin. One was excellent, one was… well, MrsVark’s FND had robbed her of her speech, but she managed to convey her thoughts on one of them quite adequately. It's a shame hardly anyone has seen this moment. It's the highlight of the series so far. Go and watch it. Make it nine views. Be a hero.

The Running Tally

• Day 1 (Sipsmith's): Solid start – 8/10 ✓
• Day 2 (Gordon's Lemon): Cleaning product disaster – 2/10 ✗
• Day 3 (Tanqueray): Respectable recovery – 7/10 ✓
• Day 4 (Darnley's Navy Strength): Quality gin, questionable timing – 7/10 ✓
• Day 5 (Moonshot Gin): A low-energy but decent gin – 7/10 ✓
• Day 6 (Edinburgh Raspberry): A house divided – 7.5/10 ✓
• Day 7 (Tanqueray Blackcurrant): Solidly mid-range – 6/10 ✓
• Day 8 (Bathtub Gin): Excellent – 9/10 ✓
• Day 9 (Boatyard Sloe Gin): A triumph – 9/10 ✓
• Day 10 (Greater Than Gin): Solidly average – 7/10 ✓
• Day 11 (Hendrick's Grand Cabaret): A resounding success – 9/10 ✓
• Day 12 (Caorunn Scottish Raspberry): Drunkenly approved – 8/10 ✓
• Day 13 (The Lakes Classic Gin): Perfectly acceptable – 7/10 ✓
• Day 14 (Jaffa Cake Gin): Better than expected – 8/10 ✓
• Day 15 (That Boutique-y Gin Company Cherry Gin): A clear winner – 6/10 ✓
• Day 16 (Spit-Roasted Pineapple Gin): Does what it says on the tin - 8/10 ✓
• Day 17 (Roku Gin): Competent and professional - 6/10 ✓

We're now 17 days into this experiment, and we've managed a 94% success rate - 16 gins scoring 6/10 or above, with only one disappointment so far. Either we’re easy to please, or this year's calendar is genuinely decent.

Glenda thinks it's because I'm a sophisticated connoisseur with a refined palate. I think it's because I'm necking neat drinking gin every night and my standards, like my liver, are gradually eroding. We've agreed to disagree.

What's Next?

We're past the halfway point now, which means we're in the home stretch. Will MrsVark return? Will Glenn come back from his Christmas card marathon? Will Glenda become a permanent fixture? Tune in tomorrow to find out. Or don't. Glenda and I will carry on regardless.

Have you tried either of these gins? Got thoughts on Glenda's debut? Leave a comment over on the YouTube video. She needs the validation. Not me though. I’m just fine shouting this stuff into the void. I don’t need no-one to tell me they found it entertaining. It’d be nice though……

The Calendar: Drinks by the Dram Gin Advent Calendar
Previous days: Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6 | Days 7, 8 & 9 | Day 10 | Day 11 | Day 12 | Day 13 | Days 14 & 15