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Shallow AF Reviews ⁽⁵⁾

Shallow reviews of stuff.

31 August 2025

Brad Pitt stands heroically beside a Formula 1 car, wearing pristine racing overalls and sporting the kind of ruggedly handsome stubble that suggests he's never actually changed a tyre. The cinematic lighting and dramatic pose scream "I'm definitely the coolest 60-year-old on the grid" whilst the movie poster promises yet another Hollywood take on motorsport that'll probably make actual F1 fans wince.

F1: The Movie - I Came to Hate, I Stayed Because It Looked Fucking Awesome

Shallow AF Reviews is for anyone who's sick of pretentious film critics…

5 May 2025

Movie poster for "The Expendables 4" showing a line of aging action stars including Statham, Stallone, 50 Cent, Fox, Lundgren, and others against a red and green explosion background. The tagline reads "OLD BLOOD MEETS NEW BLOOD" above the title "EXPEND4BLES" with a September 22 release date. Just another desperate attempt to squeeze money from a franchise that should've been put in a retirement home three films ago, featuring the usual suspects of actors who apparently can't say no to a paycheck.

Expend4bles - A Shallow AF Review

Tired of pretentious film reviews banging on about "character arcs" and "thematic…

16 March 2025

A promo image for the movie "The Electric State". It features a cartoonish robot's spherical yellow head looking straight out of the image.

The Electric State (2025) - A Shallow AF Review

Sick of those stuck-up movie critics with their heads up their asses?…

27 December 2024

PIG (2021) - A Shallow AF Review

Do film reviews seem too intellectual and "deep" for you? Do you…

7 December 2024

Jake Gyllenhaal from Road House (2024)

Road House (2024) - a shallow as fuck film review

Do film reviews seem too intellectual and "deep" for you? Do you…

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